Hi, close(r) reader!
Welcome to week one of this new series about becoming a close(r) reader! (Not sure what I’m talking about? Get all the details.)
I found, over the many semesters I taught introductory writing courses, that many of my college students brought deeply held and profoundly personal belief systems around reading to the classroom. When I assigned an essay or a novel for them to read, I realized it was less often my assignment that turned them away and more often their own personal beliefs about reading that kept them from getting engaged in whatever level they needed to be to be truly successful in the class.
By listening to them and working with them, I started to see that investigating where your own beliefs about reading lie, can give you a chance to begin to better sustain, or heal, or even fully reimagine your relationship to reading and why it matters to you.
For week one of our series, I’m hoping to help you investigate how you think about reading. You’ll be writing about beliefs you hold about reading (which may or may not contribute to how often you read), as well as creating a mind map of your ideas and landing on a single, tight sentence that summarizes your findings.
This kind of personal work can feel a little bit like excavation—digging into the dusty corners of your mind or heart that you may not visit very often. So a little discomfort may come with the exercise. Trust yourself that you know your limits and your boundaries, and if anything you start to explore feels too tender, give yourself some grace and step back.
Likewise, if you find a tender or ready or welcoming place you can’t wait to explore in more detail, take a deep breath and keep going.
This week’s exercise
We’re starting things off in a sort of classic way: with a free-writing exercise. I highly recommend doing this as a handwritten exercise, rather than typing, so that you’re away from the notification-addled environments that come with most screens. I also really want you to focus on getting the words out, in any order and as messy as they may be, and not worrying at all about polishing, spelling, or grammar. This is a free writing exercise.
So, you’re going to need a few materials:
A few loose pieces of paper, a notebook, or your current journal
A favorite pen or pencil
A timer
~45 minutes of free time
Gather your materials and we’ll get started.
Step 1: Get comfortable to write
Take a few deep breaths. Make a cup of tea or pour a glass of water. Remove any rings, bracelets, or watches that might get in your way of writing comfortably.
Make sure your pencil is sharpened or that your pen is readily flowing on the paper you’ve got. (I hate when a pen doesn’t agree with my paper texture!)
Give yourself a few reminders:
1. You cannot “do it wrong,” when you are free writing.
2. If your answer to any of the prompts below is “I don’t know,” that’s okay. Sit with that feeling. Ask yourself: Is that true? or Why don’t I know? And write about that.
3. This is writing by you and for you. You never have to share or publish or even keep the words you write down today, so divest yourself of the fear of others’ eyes, judgements, or beliefs about your beliefs.
(In fact, you can burn your pages in the sink when you’re done if that feels good to you!!)
Step 2: Begin your investigation
Take a few deep breaths and read the question below, then start a ten-minute timer. As soon as it starts ticking, write—without stopping—for the entire ten minutes.
Keep your pen or pencil moving the entire time. If you decided to type this exercise, stay in whatever app you’ve selected for writing and keep those fingers typing the entire ten minutes.
Yes, your hand will likely cramp a little. Yes, you may run out of things to say. When you do, write: “I am not sure what else to say…” or “Ummmmm” until a new thought arises. The idea is to keep your hands and your mind in sync, so that every thought can flow onto the page, unimpeded. You can also write questions instead of answers or responses.
(If you feel yourself becoming judgmental of yourself or having big feelings about what you’re writing, that’s important information. File it away as you keep your hands moving and see what happens if you let it flow.)
Question: What is “reading”? What does “reading” mean? What is the act of reading?
Imagine an alien has landed on Earth and has no concept of reading. How would you describe it to them?
This is an act of definition: think about the basic process. Break it down. Describe how it works—even if you feel like it’s obvious. Especially if you feel like it’s obvious. Describe every nook and cranny of it you can think of!
When your timer goes off, stop. Even if you’re mid-sentence.
Then, move to step 3.
Step 3: Make it personal
Take a few more deep breaths and read the question below. Set another ten-minute timer. As soon as it starts ticking, write again—without stopping—for the entire ten minutes.
Question: What does reading mean to you?
There’s no alien, anymore. This is all about you. You can write about this question from any angle.
Consider exploring: when you learned to read. How you learned to read. Why you learned to read. What it means to your personal life. How it has impacted your professional life or choices. What you feel when you read. What kinds of books you like to read.
Take the question anywhere you’d like. Again, write nonstop until your timer goes off.
Step 4: Mind map
Nice work! You wrote for twenty full minutes today!
For this step, take a few more deep breaths as you look back across what you’ve written. On a fresh sheet of paper, write “WHAT IS READING” in the center and put a shape around it (a circle, a star, a square, whatever you like).
Then, using lines (squiggly, straight, dotted, or otherwise) surround this central phrase with some of the key words from your writing today. Look back at what you’ve written and find words that repeat often in your writing, or words that feel particularly charged or meaningful to you.
Use the page to create a mind map of your personal thoughts, definitions, and meanings about “reading.”
What surprises you? What feels truest? Does anything feel false or flat? Take note of your findings, however you’d like to, and then, complete the following sentence:
I believe reading is ________________________.
Write as many versions of the sentence, as you like. Maybe it’ll turn into a paragraph; maybe it’ll stay a succinct and tidy little phrase. Whatever it is: it’s yours.
Step 5: A few final questions
Take a look at all the writing you’ve done today—and now you’ve got this amazing mind map, too. If it feels messy, consider taking more time this week to re-do it. Maybe you’ll color-code it, or use fancier paper, or expand and make it even bigger. Whatever you want. This is by you, for you.
Now that you’ve dug into these two, general questions, consider exploring a few more throughout the week:
How have your beliefs about reading changed over time?
How do your beliefs about reading relate to the time you spend doing it?
Are your beliefs about reading in line with the time you devote to it? Why or why not? (If you feel any shame creeping up in this area, notice it but do not feed it. Wonder about where the shame is coming from. Investigate it!)
Are there any ways in which would you like to adapt your beliefs on reading? Or, more simply: Do you want to change what you believe about reading for any reason?
Based on the beliefs you’ve uncovered today, do you want to make more time for reading this week? Why or why not?
Bonus: Read your thoughts aloud
If you’d like to go even deeper with this exercise: look back at all of your notes and writing from today and read it aloud to yourself. You can speak quietly, if you’re self-conscious.
The idea is that you actually, actively read yourself back to yourself.
Give yourself a chance to hear your ideas, now that you’ve written them down.
Ask yourself again: What surprises me? What feels the most true out of all of these ideas? Does anything feel half-baked or untrue?
After reading your writing aloud, revisit your sentence and revise as necessary:
I believe reading is ________________________.
That’s some powerful stuff
Hold onto these observations. They’ll help you as we progress into next week’s exercise, which will have us investigating the environments and practices we bring to and need from the reading experience.
In the comments, feel welcome to share your findings, questions, or thoughts on this week’s exercise—and to engage with each other, as you do!
I appreciate your support for the time, energy, and thinking I put into each installment of this series. Every like, comment, share, Note, and subscription means the world!
If you’ve benefitted from today’s exercise, consider upgrading to a paid subscription. Or, you can buy me a coffee!
I love this exercise and can’t wait to try it out! I feel like I’ve lost the ability to speak/write critically and coherently about books in particular over the past year or so and this feels like such a good place to begin re-learning that.
Interesting exercise. I learned I really can't write fast enough to keep up with my thoughts. I'm faster at typing, but typing also tempts me to edit as I go, so this activity really was different. I only hope I can read my stream of consciousness scribbles when I get time to transcribe and interpret what I wrote.